Dirty Dishes	Dirty Dishes Archive

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Dawn has long been fascinated with Ben Franklin, the old man of the American Revolution. Perusing H.W. Brands excellent recent bio The First American: The Life and Times of Benjamin Franklin, Dawn was amused to note Ben's advice to a young man who was not married, but nonetheless desired sex. Franklin advised sleeping with older women, cataloging his reasons for his youthful advice-seeker: older sex partners make better conversationalists; not relying on their fading beauty, they "study to be good"; they don't get pregnant; they are both more discreet and less likely to cause a fuss if their affairs are made public; they are likely to viewed as charitable for putting out for a young man, thus sparing him the health risks of prostitutes; "because in every animal that walks upright, the deficiency of the fluids that fill the muscles appears first in the highest part-- [thus], the face grows lank and wrinkled, then the neck, then the breast and arms, the lower parts continuing to the last as plump as ever, so that covering all above with a basket, and regarding only what is below the girdle, it is impossible of two women to know an old from a young one-- and as in the dark all cats are grey, the pleasure of corporal enjoyment with an old woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every knack being by practice capable of improvement"; because young girls may feel violated, but older women are more likely to feel pleasure; and, Dawn's favorite, "they are so grateful!"

While Franklin was writing over two hundred years ago, and in a decidedly heterosexual context, Dawn recommends his sage advice to all today's homo twinkies. Remember kids, it's cool to sleep with older guys....