Don't ask, don't tell
What's a married bi guy to do if he wants to escape the domestic bliss for a few days to raunch-it-up in Las Vegas at the 5th Annual Bi Men Getaway Weekend this March 30th to April 2nd?
"Plan ahead to attend," advise organizers. "Most married men who've come in the past were 'at' some convention or trade show or business-related work event. The best 'cover'
these days is a company-mandatory 'diversity workshop' where
no wives are allowed to accompany you & inform your wife/partner about this mandatory company unpleasant workshop far ahead
of time."
Whoever thought corporate America's dubious diversity fetish could have such a sinisterly sexy silver lining?
But the bigger question is: are bisexuals prone to be two-faced as well as ambisextrous? Or does the problem lie with traditional matrimony, with its honored-in-the-breach conceits
of sexual exclusivity?
With righteous homosexuals rushing into gay marriage like lemmings over a cliff, circuit-party and leather-fest organizers beware: the problem faced today by married bi guys will
be tomorrow's trouble for bound-in-wedlock gay men hoping to break away from hubby for some extramural action. Maybe all gay events should in the future come with the cover
of respectable-sounding continuing-education modules attached!
As for the Bi-Men Getaway, with wives and the fairer sex generally barred at the door, the action looks like it's going to slide toward the homo side of the binary equation. With lots
of socials, lunches, and trips-to-casinos, you can count on plenty of "computing" going on between the bi guys and what can be expected will be some of their more mono-minded gay admirers.
Indeed, organizers ecumenically invite bi-men, the "bi-curious," and gay men to their confab. Bi-seeking gays are one of the "ten archetypes of bisexual" listed on the
bi-men's interesting web site. "Backroom 'Woe-man' Ron" is a gay man who assembles a stable of gay-sex-hungry married bi guys. "'Ron' is the male counterpart of heterosexual women who
seem to endlessly get themselves involved with married or otherwise paired men. Ron loves the intense sex with married men who do
not get nearly as much man to man action as Ron does.
Ron may seem like a loner and tends to make each of his 'special guys' feel intense pleasure and feel 'special'-- but Ron often has a large 'stable' of such married stallions as his own private
stud farm. Ron all too often spends holidays alone as his guys almost all have family obligations with wives and kids."
And then even higher on the food chain of sexual abstraction are the gay guys who go ape over the gay guys who fall for bi-men-- but we'll save that topic for another column.
Wherever you fall on the spectrum of trysexuality, browse to www.bimen.org, or call to reserve your place (don't ask for "Bi Men Getaway"-- instead ask for the "Beta Mu
Weekend," or just mention "Code BMW" at the hotel reservation desk: 866-946-4373). Bi! Oops, we mean, "bye!"
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