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By
Giacomo Tramontagna
Full Body Contact
Rating: 2 Stars
Produced, photographed, and directed by Blade Thompson. Edited by Andrew Rosen at Aries Post. Starring Rod Barry, Seth Black, Blade Thompson, Dino DiMarco, Drew Andrews, Sam Crockett,
Sweet Williams, Chance Caldwell, and Christian Blair.
How to order
Porn star and auteur wannabe Blade Thompson seems to have worn a few too many hats in this lackluster effort, whose most professional aspect is the editing by Andrew Rosen of the L.A. postproduction service Aries
Post. In addition to producing, directing, and presiding over the videography, Thompson appears in the role of a soccer coach. He also serves as narrator, appearing between scenes in white button-fly Calvin Klein boxer briefs
to make unnecessary cheese-brained comments he presumably wrote himself. "Pretty fuckin' hot," he keeps saying. "That was a helluva hot scene." In this context, those remarks fall somewhere between self-congratulation
and wishful thinking.
The theme is contact sports. In the first segment, football players Chance Caldwell and Sweet Williams get it on in what Thompson accurately describes as a "really dirty bathroom." In the second,
wrestlers Rod Barry and Seth Black get unimaginatively intimate in the shower. Next, soccer players Sam Crockett and Christian Blair cavort dutifully with Coach Thompson. Finally, baseball players Dino DiMarco and
Drew Andrews, though they try too hard, give us a scene that almost delivers. It's a bit of a stretch to consider baseball a contact sport, but viewers who make it that far into
Full Body Contact aren't likely to care.
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